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Permanent link to: <br /><br /><a href="http://www.chrisboylan.com/blog/archives/000212.php">I Have a Cold</a>

<p>I have not been able to breathe out of my left nostril for a few hours now, which is much more annoying than I remember. My lovely girlfriend, <a href="http://www.amberkmiller.com">Amber</a> brought this miscreant virus into our apartment a few days ago. I've had a sore throat for about two days, but I only started feeling like real crap in the last 12 hours or so. </p>

<p>My current dilemma is whether or not to see the doctor. My suspicion is that I have a cold, which is caused by a virus - and thus, uncureable. All a doctor would do is treat the symptoms, which I can do myself with a huge bottle of Dimetapp. The reason for this suspicion? Every time I blow my nose, like everyone else on this planet - I instinctually open the tissue to see what just came out.</p>

<p>Now, some would deride this as gross, but it is perfectly natural. Every day, we pour liquids into our head to drink and shove food in our skull to eat. It is a rare occasion that our heads reverse the process and present us with a gift. Most of the time, it's just some hunk of ear wax propelling itself out my ear (which I always check out as well). However, on days we are sick the nose joins in the fun.</p>

<p>As my sister can attest, the nose is normally the receiver of objects. Like Legos. When the tables are turned, it can release two things: clear, runny mucus (a sign of a virus or allergy); or disturbingly discolored goo - usually in the color range of flourescent green to greenish-yellow to creepy brown. If the latter is the case, it is a sign of a bacterial infection somewhere in the Ear, Nose Throat region. This can be cured by antibiotics. Viruses cannot. Thus, I will probably not go to the doctor.</p>

<p>Side note: When I was little, my pediatrician was located next to an Ear, Nose and Throat doctor. I was always confused by the odd collection of bodyparts to specialize in. Why not be a toenail, butt and little-hanging-thing-in-the-back-of-your-throat (uvula) doctor?</p>

<p>P.P.S. Uvula is a great word. So is ungulate. It is a general term for a hooved mammal (i.e. cow, giraffe). I believe it's pronounced un-guh-lait.</p>